30 Things I Learnt At 30

May your 30s be bold, bright and beautiful!

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This blog was never sketched out or written down. I have a habit of taking quick notes in the notes app of my phone. Every time, a thought struck my mind, I noted it down. What you find below is in fact a personal note converted into a blog post. This is why it's raw, real and imperfect - the features I am trying to embody currently. I hope all my readers take away something from this heartfelt note.

1. Relationships tell you more about yourself than others.

2. Learning to control your emotions is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. Fair warning: It doesn’t come easy. But once you get there, you can get by daily events of your life like a pro.

3. Watch your self respect sky rocket if you are just able to set boundaries with people.

4. Self care is not a 32 step skin care routine if you are ignoring your inner energy needs. Example: Some days your social battery might be dead so you should bail on that meet up.

5. The best form of self care is when you start treating yourself like your daughter: brush your hair, keep yourself in the best form physically, don’t be harsh if you fail, motivate yourself to pursue your next goal.

6. Your home is not in your partner. It is in you. If not, you need to start building asap.

7. Friends are a very important part of your life - the ones you can share without the fear of judgement. If you have a handful of these, you’re doing good.

8. If you feel discomfort and obliged in asking help from a friend, you might need to reevaluate how great that friendship is.

9. Many a times we feel stuck in a rut. If you fall prey to self pity and complaining at this stage, it's going to take longer to get out.

10. Building up of unexpressed emotions is real, painful and lethal. Take the time out to regularly express your emotions to your partner/friend/parent/coworker so you can avoid the state of disgruntlement with them . Combat this situation with kindness towards both yourself and the other person.

11. Communication skills is the top most skill you can have. It’s not your fluency or proficiency in a language but the ability to communicate your needs without an emotional stir in yourself or the other person.

12. Getting out of your comfort zone is not working harder than you did before or making yourself suffer in harsh conditions. It’s actually letting go off what you once loved. It's walking towards something new and underdeveloped which probably stands nowhere close to the one you are leaving behind. But you do it because you are capable of beautiful things, you believe in yourself and you can’t let yourself sit in your cocoon. The butterfly has to fly away.

13. Solitude is not the solution but it will become a problem when you get too comfortable with it.

14. Family is all you got when things go down south. Start developing relationships within your household with your immediate and non-immediate family members.

15. Challenge the status quo once in a while but avoid doing it every time. It sets you up for a bad relationship.

16. Your reputation is important. It’s not how others perceive you but how you perceive yourself. Write down what kind of person you think you are: someone who complains a lot, works hard, is rude, loving, caring, ambitious, good with people etc. This should get you the answers to most of your questions.

17. In times of trouble, uphold your values and your self respect. No matter how much you feel like giving up, stand true to your beliefs. I promise it will feel better the next day.

18. When you are struggling to fall asleep after a rough day, try hugging yourself out. It feels amazing. Like a feeling of coming home and a feeling of “I got myself”. That’s how you create a safe zone and home for yourself than creating it with someone else.

19. Try to distinguish between people and their qualities. Admire their qualities without putting them on a pedestal.

20. Every heartbreak, failure or when you hit the rock bottom is an opportunity to reinvent yourself, become a whole new person and glow up. Life is different when you make this mental shift.

21. Evil eye is real. But being scared of it all the time like most of us do these days is also stupid. When you have pure thoughts and intentions towards your actions, you won’t attract evil eye.

22. The power of organizing is crazy. Every answer lies in organizing. Organizing your life, routine, tasks, surroundings etc. It makes you feel good, be more productive, bring balance and cut down on stress. If you have to be dedicated towards something, this could be that one thing.

23. Obsession is bad. Be it with your partner, goals or work. You need to learn to stay unattached. Very dedicated but still unattached.

24. Step into your native gender roles once in a while. It keeps you in touch with your feminine/ masculine side. Girls, try cooking and serving. Boys, try providing for your family. It actually brings power back in your hands.

25. If you are quick to point out toxicity in others and have been following the cancel/ block out culture. Stop and reflect, you can be the toxic one too.

26. On the days you are down and feel low, count your blessings. You have all the things you once dreamt of as a child.

27. When you keep setting unrealistic expectations with your partner thinking you deserve the world and that person should be getting the moon and stars for you. You are acting like a prized possession, learn to be human.

28. Travel to Europe before 30. Save and make it happen because it's 200% worth it.

29. If you are healthy, fit and have a good body today, remember you can’t have it till tomorrow. Start conserving.

30. Building a wholesome life is building a life with a circle of friends, family, work, hobbies, good habits, health while getting to spend time with yourself and enjoying your own company.

At the rooftop garden from our Airbnb in Hanoi - Vietnam 16th September 2023